Low Pressure Play Time

Sometimes kids might have anxiety around verbal communication. There could be a lot of reasons for this. Maybe they are shy, have an articulation disorder, stutter, other things I haven't thought about, or a combination of these factors. Sometimes, it is appropriate to put a little pressure on children to communicate. I do this SOMETIMES with offering forced-choice questions or even saying "tell me..." I've found, however, that usually, the harder you push, the harder a child is going to push back and dig his/her heels in. I found that for most children, it is more effective to tempt them to communicate by waiting (so, so much wait time and silence), talking about what you or they are already doing, or playing dumb (it has to be believable).

It is not always the case that kids are not talking because they are anxious about it, sometimes they do not yet have the words, or maybe they have learned that not talking is an effective way to avoid. If you have questions about your particular child, please talk to me, Annette, or Amanda.

For kids who truly do have anxiety around communication, one of the best ways I have found that supports their communication skills, is providing a time for low pressure communication exchanges. This allows a safe space for a child to communicate (or NOT - if that is what they choose, low pressure remember) and be communicated with. The goal is to share a moment and attention with a child. My goal is usually 20 minutes but 5 minutes is more doable and will still make a difference.

During this time provide:

• Comments NOT questions
• No clarifying questions, watch your intonation on the end of your phrases
• Way more silence than you are comfortable with
• Materials you and your child can both engage with separately and together
• No distractions (i.e., cell phone)

It truly does not matter what you are doing, as long as it is something your child is interested in. I usually just join a child with what they are already doing. I took an example of me interacting with my son. It is EIGHT minutes but stick with me.